Dinnertime at the Henderson household was very routine growing up. At 6 p.m. sharp, we all met in the kitchen for our nightly duties. I set the table, my brother filled the glasses with water, and Pops would pull out his Cornish hen from the oven. By 6:30 we filed into our seats around the table, and Mama would serve us a choice of two or three meals that she had prepared that night, something fancy and something simple.
We all knew the rules, and we all knew our roles. The rules: sit down as a family to discuss the day’s events. The roles: Parents ask questions, children give as little information as possible.
My brother and I often spoke in robotic tones to answer most questions.
How was your day?
Fine.
What did you do today?
Nothing.
Did you have a good day at school?
Yes.
Let’s just say dinnertime with the "fam" did not make us closer, nor did it promote open communication. It was painful for all of us. But like a swift kick in the pants, it all changed. Pops had enough. No more one-word answers. No more prying out information. Pops genuinely wanted more; he wanted to know about his family. And he brilliantly instituted the one question that would get us to dig inside and open up. This simple question would bring an end to the agonizing interrogation and spawn a loving conversation.
Each night Pops would ask around the table, “What’s the best thing that happened to you today?” The answer begged for a response that was thought provoking and filled with gratitude. “The best thing is that I got to play with Sarah Burton at recess.” With this new question, family dinners changed forever. We still followed our rules, but this question opened us up to more loving, open communication.
This has been my favorite question ever since. What’s the Best Thing That Has Happened to You Today? has totally changed my life! It is what I ask to spark conversation instead of asking the mundane, “Hi, how are you?”… to which few people offer a response other than the generic “fine” one-word answer… It is an inspiring question that gets people thinking, sparks creativity, and celebrates gratitude all in one fell swoop!
I have been asking this question for years, yet not until recently have I realized the impact that it has on other people. It was Halloween, and I buzzed up to a party, dressed in my beautiful honeybee costume. A guy came up to me and excitedly asked, “What’s the best thing that happened to you today?”
As I went into my heart to ponder my day, I stopped dead in my tracks. That’s my question! But how did he know that question? The confusion on my face was evident. He reminded me that we met at a sandwich shop a few months prior, and I had asked him the question. He shared what an impact it had on his day. He was feeling stressed out, and this simple question brought a smile to his face.
Time and time again that question brings forward such a state of gratitude. Even on the crummiest days, there is always one best thing.
With its simple brilliance, this Question has definitely taken on a life of its own. What began in the Henderson Household is quickly spreading across the globe like wildfire. And I am so grateful that I can be an instrument of pollinating the love with this great question. It has also recruited several of my friends to ask the question of others.
I added this to my outgoing message on my cell phone, and you can imagine the lively messages I am receiving. “Hey Honeybee, the best thing that has happened to me today is: I celebrated my daughter’s first birthday; I went to lunch with a dear friend; the sweet greeting my dog gave me when I got home; the ice cream cone I bought as a treat.” Simple things that make people happy make me super happy! Retrieving messages are now one of my best things of the day! One friend is kicking it new school and sending me a text message each day to let me know his best thing of the day. I am so thankful for the lovely messages that friends are leaving, but what has truly amazed me are the messages that are being left by strangers.
Perhaps the heaviness of life has fallen upon you, but I encourage you to break free from the weight of the world, tap into your heart, and search for the one thing that you can honestly say is the best thing of the whole day. It doesn't have to be some monumental thing, just the best thing of that day. And the great news is that there is always a best thing. It could be waking up and seeing the dew on the grass, or petting your dog, or talking to a friend, or you fill in the blank. It is your best thing.
This question will spread the love all on its own. The only thing that it asks is that we ask it over and over and over again. It wants to be spread and shared. So it’s not me that’s asking, but the question itself that is pleading….ask a friend, ask a stranger, but more importantly, ask yourself: What is the best thing that happened to you today?
Honeybee Henderson can be found pollinating love in Venice, CA. When she is not asking people, "What's the best thing that happened to you today?" she facilitates others in opening their heart in her Spiritual Counseling practice. Read more about Honeybee at www.souldiving.org